Friday, January 12, 2018

Lachrymose.

Times like these when everyone's asleep,
the demons in my head they come out to play.
Nothing I can do but to accept defeat,
and pray that somehow I'd live to see another day.

It's gonna be a long night,

a long lone battle once again.
But it's okay, it's okay.
This isn't the first time anyway.

. . . 

These thoughts grow rampant as the night falls silent.

The emptiness engulfs my soul as it takes over control.
Why won't they stop and leave me alone?

//

I don't know what this feeling is.
I can't find the right words to describe it.
My heart feels empty, but my mind feels cluttered.
It's a mess, an uncontrollable mess.

How can I deal with it, if I don't know what it is?
I'm tired, but I don't want to sleep.
I like being alone, but it's getting lonely.
I don't know what I want anymore.
What do I even know anymore?

Where can I turn to, where can I go?
I don't know, I really don't know.
I need respite for this weary and defeated soul.

I feel pain, but I don't know what hurts.
All I know is that it hurts.
It hurts.