Tuesday, January 29, 2019

cycle

Social interactions are so draining for me.

Because I tend to overthink every little thing.
Because I am always afraid of saying the wrong things.
Because I care too much about what others think about me.

So I tend to push people away.
So I tend to not reach out.
So I tend to disappear. 

But consequences are starting to present themselves.
I can't live like that.
I'd be doing myself dirty.

I need to change. 
I know I need to change.
But I'm afraid of taking that first step.

I'm afraid of everything.
And hence I can get nothing done.
It's a vicious cycle.

So I'm stuck here complaining.
Like the loser I am.
I'll never amount to anything.